Gnu Glasses
The worst part of training for a marathon is waiting for race day. I figured the two week layoff from training and physical activity would be fun. I would lie around the around the house, catch up on some of my favorite shows, and get some much needed sleep. I have managed to get most of those things done. The problem now is I have two more days until race day and more energy than I know what to do with. I hadn’t realized how much of time had become devoted to training.
Lucky for me, I have a few tricks up my sleeve when it comes to wasting time. They may not be the most productive way to spend one’s time, but they get the job done:
3. C-SPAN- The Cable Sattelite Public Affairs Network, also known as C-SPAN is the 
definitive place to go if you want to know what’s going on in our country. C-SPAN provides viewers with wall-to-wall coverage of congressional hearings and other soul stirring political meetings. I used to view C-SPAN as a sedative for sleepless nights until I discovered the true joy of watching C-SPAN is watching the call-in shows. I don’t know what the show is called but there is a moderator sitting behind a wooden desk discussing issues of the day with call-in listeners. It’s sort of like televised talk radio. If you ever need to feel better about yourself, this is the show to watch. The people who call into this show do their best to sound intelligent but fall so far off the mark it’s kind of cute. Then there’s the poor, random moderator who has to listen to these people jabber on and on. The moderator is always respectful, but has this pained look on his or her face that makes it obvious they made the wrong career choice.
I was in class the other night when I suddenly had the urge to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It was one of those deep cravings where my professor’s head turned into a PB &J. I began to think who ever came with the idea to marry those two items deserves a place in heaven. This led me to search “Who invented the PB & J?”. I found the answer and a bunch of other useless information http://www.whoinventedit.net. It’s like Wikipedia, except focus mostly on the origin of popular items.
1. Craigslist- I have never bought or sold anything on craigslist nor have I never tried to 
meet anyone. However, there is a reason it is saved on my computer as a favorite site. I love scanning the missed connections page. In this section, people post ads seeking out people they met in person but were too scared to talk to or lost contact with. I don’t know how often this works out for people but my guess is not that often. However, these ads usually rank a solid 10 on the unintentional comedy scale. Take for instance this gem I found a while back:
“To the guy that lives in Westlake. I think your name was Craig or Greg. Really that is not important. What is important is…you can have your wallet back. I did not steal it…it fell out into my van that first time we had sex in the parking lot I assume. Ordinarily I wouldn’t worry about returning a wallet and really it doesn’t even have anything with your name on it so.,…so maybe you do not want it back. It was pretty empty…which is sad. I guess good for you cause had there been cash I would have kept it. And sorry I snuck out of your apartment in the middle of the night like that. The buzz was starting to wear off and you were passed out so I didn’t want to deal with that odd morning dismissal thing. By the way also…you keep a very clean bathroom for a man…I am very impressed! I prefer not to hook up with you again….no offense but you didn’t warn me that you were so…odd in the sack. But I will gladly meet you at a neautral(sic) place to return your near empty wallet if you so desire! PS We met at Kelly’s pub 2. Not sure how many girls you pick up there…probably not many considering your wallet was empty and you did have a bit of an issue with your teeth which I was able to overlook thanks to all that New Castle!”
Saturday can’t get here fast enough….
Gnu Glasses 